


Have We Done "It" Yet?

by jcTattoo65



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Canon Compliant, Conversations, Developing Relationship, Gay Sex, Healthy Relationships, Light Angst, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex Talk, Talking, talking about anal sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 04:20:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20383561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jcTattoo65/pseuds/jcTattoo65
Summary: Patrick's worried that David will get tired of waiting so long to have "real sex" with him. David has a different definition of "real sex."“Okay,” David says again, taking a breath and nodding his head quickly as if to reassure himself that they will somehow get through this baffling situation. “Let’s start with the first part of your statement,” he tries, attempting to parse the words in his head as he says them out loud.  “You said I could be havingrealsex, moments after you literally swallowed my dick.”“Well, not literally…”





	Have We Done "It" Yet?

**Author's Note:**

> I've been reading Patrick/David fic voraciously for months and never intended to try my hand at writing until an idea came to me that I just couldn't drop. Patrick's worried about getting to "home plate" with David, worried he won't like it once they get there. David doesn't know what that even means. They figure it out. The angst is ultra light. The ending is happy. 
> 
> Please leave your thoughts, including constructive criticism and differences of opinion. For real. It's my first time posting, and I have a lot to learn.
> 
> Thank you to [olive2read](https://archiveofourown.org/users/olive2read/pseuds/olive2read) for proofreading for me and to the folks at the Rosebudd Motel for putting up with my little rant and then encouraging me to write this.
> 
> UPDATE: So, Olive just pointed out to me that home plate is never referred to as fourth base. I will not feel shamed for writing "fourth base," as it only makes me feel closer to David, who also knows nothing about sportsball. However, Patrick Brewer would never say "fourth base," so I have revised the story with that correction, as well as a few edits from Olive that make it even funnier. And this will teach me not to post or request proofreading after midnight.

* * *

“Thank you, David,” Patrick whispers, his voice raspy as he rises from his kneeling position on the stained motel carpet and presses his lips to David’s ear, pushing David’s naked body back against the dingy beige wall.

David opens his eyes, shakes his head a bit, and blinks. “Um… for what?” 

“For letting me go slow? For not pushing us to have sex before I’m ready.”

David blinks again. “Well, it seems to me,” he murmurs, “it didn't take you long to be ready, and judging from this… world-class performance just now? Um… it didn't take you long to become highly proficient either.” His mouth twists shyly into the crooked, sideways smile that has been sparking little fireworks in Patrick’s chest and stomach and groin since the moment before their first kiss in the front seat of Patrick’s car exactly one month ago.

Now it’s Patrick’s turn to blink. “Huh.”

“Not that it would have mattered if it had taken you twice or… thrice as long to be ready for sex. There’s no schedule here. No timeline. No…” his voice rises a little as he enunciates, “spreadsheet of due dates.” Patrick blinks again. “Um…” David pauses. “Unless there... is?”

“No, no schedule, David, it’s just…”

“Hmm…” David cuts him off. There’s a look on Patrick’s face he can’t quite interpret. Pensive? Worried? Not the satisfied look of a man who’s just had fantastic sex. “Okay. It sounds like maybe there’s a conversation needing to happen here?” David’s eyes dart around the shabby motel room and land on the pile of clothing tossed haphazardly across his twin bed. “How about we have that conversation with our clothes on, just in case Alexis and my parents come back from dinner sooner than usual.”

David would have preferred to have sex with Patrick somewhere besides the sad little motel room he’s shared with his sister since the Rose family was banished to this godforsaken wilderness. But desperate… er... _ trying _ times require compromises, however incorrect they might be. And as much as David had insisted earlier in the day that he didn't want to make a big deal of their one month anniversary, a secret part of him feels it’s something to be celebrated with at least a bit of furtive sex that doesn’t take place crammed into the back seat of Patrick’s car or among the shipping boxes in the back room of their store or hiding under blankets at Ray’s house hoping not to be walked in on. 

David pulls on his version of pajamas, sits on the bed and props a pillow against the wall. “So,” he continues, patting the space beside him, “You have some concerns about our sex life?”

“No, no concerns,” Patrick replies too quickly, joining David on the bed and trying to keep his voice reassuring and lighter than he feels. “Well, except, I mean, I’m grateful that you’ve been willing to wait to have sex with me, but… I do worry that it’s not fair to you. That I’m making you wait too long when you could be…”

“I could be what?” David cuts him off again, then bites at his bottom lip. He really should give Patrick the space to say whatever he needs to say. He should be a good person. But he’s getting that familiar, tight feeling in his belly that lets him know his current relationship is starting to run off course. And after Patrick _ just _gave him that mind-blowing orgasm a few minutes ago, it really isn’t fair. But it also isn’t entirely unexpected.

“You could be having real sex with people who know what they’re doing and not just waiting for me to be ready.” Patrick stares at the opposite wall and lowers his voice. “What if I’m never ready?”

“Okay...” David responds slowly, dragging out the sound as if somehow the longer he makes it last, the more likely he’ll be to make sense of Patrick’s words before silence swallows him up. But no. Nope. Still not making sense. And Patrick, sweet Patrick, is still sitting there holding his breath. Waiting. “Um… so here’s the thing,” David starts, “I understand all of the words you just said individually? But I’m having trouble understanding them one after the other, consecutively, in a row.”

“What do you mean?”

“Uh… what do _ I _ mean? What do _ you _ mean?”

Patrick shrugs his shoulders, becoming as confused as David apparently is.

“Okay,” David says again, taking a breath and nodding his head quickly as if to reassure himself that they will somehow get through this baffling situation. “Let’s start with the first part of your statement,” he tries, attempting to parse the words in his head as he says them out loud. “You said I could be having real sex, moments after you literally swallowed my dick.”

“Well, not literally…”

“Shh!” David stops him with a finger wag. This is definitely not the appropriate time for the kind of petty pedantry that reminds him of his dad. Ew. As if there ever were an appropriate time for that. “Patrick, you took my cum down your throat like a fucking pro (thank you very much) and licked the last drops from my cock like the cute little perfectionist you are. And now you’re telling me that that mind-blowing orgasm you just gave me wasn’t _ real _?” 

“David,” Patrick’s eyes get wide as he turns to look at this man that he’s crazy about. “Of course that was real. Oh my god. How could you think that’s what I meant? Everything about what we do together feels more real to me than anything I’ve ever done with…” he looks away for a second before continuing, “um… anyone else.”

David’s brow is still furrowed. “Then what did you mean about real sex?”

“Um… it wasn’t so much about the real part as the sex part? Making you wait to have sex. I just don’t think it’s fair…”

“Uh-huh…” David starts, realization beginning to dawn on him. “So, what you’re saying is that for you, oral sex is not sex?”

Patrick pauses to think and, for once, David lets him. “Okay,” he attempts to explain, “You know the baseball analogy, right?” 

David thinks for a minute and then begins to nods his head, slowly. He wraps his arm around Patrick’s shoulders, his stomach muscles relaxing a bit. He’s pretty sure he understands what Patrick’s getting at. “Shockingly, I’ve never played baseball? But I think I know where you’re going with this. This is less about the ball and more about the bases, right?”

Patrick laughs gently and nods his head. “Well, it could have something to do with balls. But yeah, I’m really talking about bases.” Then, worried, “This is totally juvenile, isn’t it?”

“No... No. I mean, yes, it’s funny. But who said sex had to be serious? Please tell me what the bases mean to you.”

“Well, okay…” Patrick’s voice gets lower, deeper, slower. “First base is kissing, what we did in my car a month ago and have been doing every day since then.” He looks at David’s lips and touches them with the tips of his fingers, whispering, “I can’t imagine ever wanting to stop kissing you.”

And okay, David’s stomach tightens again, but in a good way, as Patrick’s fingers send little tingles down his body from his lips to his cock. And yes, he’s still breathing. “Go on.”

“Second base is, um… petting? You know, hands stuff.” He slides his hand from David’s lips down the front of his sweater and then up underneath. “God, I love touching you,” he whispers into David’s neck, “feeling the hair on your chest, the way I can make your nipples hard by barely touching them.” He grazes a finger over a nipple as if to make his point. And yeah, he makes the point.

“So…” David stammers a little and swallows, “does second base go any lower?”

“Hmm… not really clear on that? Maybe?” He cups the front of David’s sleep pants with his hand, feeling the slightest quickening underneath, David’s sharp little intake of breath. He’s good at this, at making David squirm. “Maybe that’s part of third base? Not sure. But third base is also taking you in my mouth.” He pauses, and now his breath is a bit ragged and he’s licking his lips a little. David wonders if he’s even conscious of what he’s doing. “Holy fuck,” Patrick gasps, “You taste so good to me, David.”

“Mmmm…” David squeezes his eyes shut and moans a little. “What else is on third base?”

“Third base is also me sliding my dick between these soft lips of yours and fucking your mouth until I come.” And now, he’s wrapping both arms around David’s waist and kissing deep into his mouth as if he’s desperate to have any part of himself inside him. David’s tongue meets Patrick’s, and they're lost for a few minutes in the pure sensations of warmth and wetness and… safety? Yeah, this feels safe. Like they know each other. Like no matter what words are coming out of their mouths, this feeling is something they can trust.

After a bit, who knows how long, really, because time? What’s time? David pulls away gently and leans his forehead against Patrick’s. “This is lovely, but I don’t think we’ve finished with the baseball, have we?”

Patrick glances down. David can see that this is the hard part. The part that terrifies him.

“What is fourth base, Patrick?”

Patrick shakes his head. “It’s called home plate, David.” 

David catches himself mid eye-roll and disguises it with a blink. “Mm-hmm…” he purrs, encouraging.

“Home plate is … it’s how you score. It’s, you know, it’s a big deal.”

And now, David’s rubbing slow circles on Patrick’s back, comforting, listening. He’s actually listening.

“With girls, reaching home plate is sex.”

“Mm-hm. And so, I ask again, what do you mean by _ sex _ , Patrick? A lot of people use that word and just assume that everyone else understands them. But honestly? We don’t all mean the same thing by it. We don’t. So…for you, what... _ actions _... are on fourth base?”

Patrick looks like he’s going to correct David’s usage of “fourth base” again, but instead, he looks up into David’s eyes and hesitates.

“Sweetheart,” David croons, “there are no right or wrong answers. And, yeah, okay, that sounds like a stupid cliche, but when it comes to sexual feelings and preferences, it’s actually true.”

Patrick sighs audibly as if he’s made a choice. A choice to let go of needing to be the one with the answers, the one in charge. A choice to trust David. And as dirty as his mouth has been up until this point (he’s cultivated that dirty talk over the past month, relishing the way David loses his shit when those words spill out of him, the way he loses his own shit, to be honest), he doesn’t have the confidence to continue with that now. 

“Okay,” he says, straightening up again and fixing his stare back to the wall, “with girls, reaching home plate is intercourse.” David blinks at him but hopes that if he stays quiet, Patrick will keep going. “You know. Penis in vagina. I’ve done that. I mean, I can come that way. Usually. Sometimes not. Sometimes I lose my erection before we get to the end, and then I just feel bad for letting them down and we… go back to doing other things.” He pauses, and then, eyes stricken, “David, I don’t want to let you down!”

David turns Patrick’s face towards his, holds it in his hands, just as he had in the car a month ago, but now, he’s kissing the side of Patrick’s head and whispering, “It’s okay. It’s okay. I understand.” He waits until Patrick’s breathing slows a bit before pushing ahead. “So, and you might think the answer to this is obvious, but I really don’t want to make assumptions, can you tell me what fo— um home plate means to you... for guys?”

Patrick whispers, “Anal. Anal sex. That’s where we’re heading, eventually, right?” Then, a little louder, “I mean, I want it. Or I think I want it. David, I’ve done research. I’ve watched porn. I mean, some porn. I was afraid of getting a computer virus from some of those sites… anyway, I got excited. I did. My dick got… But...”

David’s just nodding his head, trying to reign in the grin that’s starting to bloom on his face. After a beat, he says, “Okay… first of all, Internet? Not always the best source of information. Nevertheless, I can show you where to find porn that’s hot and also safe. But… we are getting sidetracked right now, so... where we’re heading? I have no idea. For me, sex doesn’t have a finish line. Sex is whatever feels good with the partner I’m with. And this past month...” he pulls on the neck of Patrick’s t-shirt and nibbles on his collarbone, just a little, “sex with you has felt amazing.”

Patrick’s lips quirk briefly into the tiniest hint of a grin. It’s gone almost immediately, but not before David notices. 

Patrick barrels on, “But you have so much experience. Aren’t there more things you want to do? Things you’d be disappointed not to do eventually? You know, real sex. Real… fucking.”

“No,” David replies. “No. Are there are more things we could do? Sure, but nothing that I’d be disappointed not to do.” Then, “Look, a few minutes ago, you sat here and told me that everything about what we do together feels more real to you than anything you’ve done with anyone else.”

“It does. I meant it. It does.”

“Patrick,” David smiles softly, “I feel that way too.”

“You do?”

“Yes,” he says with a breath. “Yes! And that other thing you said… about me having sex with people who know what they’re doing? I’ve been with people who _ supposedly _ ‘knew what they were doing.’ Sometimes it was fine. Sometimes it wasn’t. Sometimes they... “ He almost says, “left me tied to the bed with a spreader bar between my legs and the lights on while they went out for dinner with their ex and forgot to close the window, so moths…” but thinks better of it. Too soon. Instead, he says, “Sometimes they weren’t so nice. All I’m saying is that I don’t want any of that. I want to be with you, for as long as you want to be with me, and…”

“Oh, I want to be with you,” Patrick breathes into David’s neck.

“And this sex that we’re having right now, which… you can call it whatever you want, but to me, it’s real sex… this sex we’re having?” He thinks to himself, _ This messy, sometimes imperfect, sometimes silly and awkward, sometimes transcendent sex that we’re having? _ “I’m loving every minute of it.

“Look, I can’t promise you that we’ll always be on the same page or that we’ll both always want to do or try the same things, although, just to be clear, there are a lot of things we could try that might not fit on your bases because they fit, I don’t know, between the bases? Or maybe they’re part of an entirely different game? Like not even a sport? Like a board game or… I just… I just think that there’s no need to get ahead of ourselves.” He can’t believe he’s the one saying this, talking another human being down from future tripping. “But if that happens, if there are things I want to do that you don’t or vice versa, we’ll fall off that bridge when we get to it. I mean, okay erase that. We’ll…”

Patrick leans in and stops him with the sweetest, the most tender kiss he can muster. “I know, David, you’re right. We’ll get through it together.”

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> So yeah, we all know that David actually _has_ played baseball. But in my head, he's repressed the memory until his dad reminds him of it in Season 5.
> 
> I'm @jcTattoo65 on Twitter


End file.
